


I have met my destiny (In quite a similar way)

by bennettmp339



Category: Captain America (Movies), Iron Man (Movies), The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Costume, Don’t copy to another site, Gen, Howard Stark's A+ Parenting, Iron Man Suit - Freeform, Tony Stark Bingo 2019, Tony Stark Has A Heart, tony stark is a sassy little shit, uniform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-13
Updated: 2019-04-13
Packaged: 2020-01-12 12:28:20
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,128
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18446552
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bennettmp339/pseuds/bennettmp339
Summary: Tony gets arrested. It's not Steve's fault.





	I have met my destiny (In quite a similar way)

**Author's Note:**

> This is for Tony Stark Bingo, bingo square K2 - Kink: Costume Porn. I decided to take it in a slightly different direction. 
> 
> _I have met my destiny (In quite a similar way)_ references events from Iron Man 2, Avengers (2012), and Iron Man 3.
> 
> The title is from the song [ "Waterloo" by ABBA ](https://open.spotify.com/track/0RzhMHIsFMbOGh0oWDvNNK?si=vn6QZvpISWWPQ-O_EBYi4Q).  
> Andersson, Benny, Fältskog, Agnetha A., Lyngstad, Anni-Frid, and Ulvaeus, Björn K. (1974). Waterloo. [Recorded by ABBA]. On _Waterloo_. [Audio File]. Stockholm, Sweden: Polar Music.

Steve started it. That’s what he would tell anyone who asked. Even the judge. Anyone. Steve started it. 

No one would believe him, since everyone saw Steve as this Boy Scout, Choirboy, All-American, boy-next-door Hero, not the sassy little shit who _lied on his enlistment paperwork_ , told bad jokes, and thought bananas tasted funny.

Tony was man enough to admit that most of their early confrontation had been driven by the Sceptre, trying to drive them apart. Had they met under better circumstances, had Tony’s life not just fallen apart over palladium poisoning, requiring him to synthesize a new element, had Howard not spent years comparing to Steve to Tony in such a way that made Steve out to be the perfect human and Tony out to be… not so perfect, they might have been friends. In another world, they would have been best friends, snarky little shits the both of them. 

They were getting along much better recently - saving the world together will do that - so Tony was surprised that Steve didn’t take his advice when he got called for jury duty and ended up declared “in contempt of court” and needing to be bailed out of jail. It turned out that judges didn’t like it when you mouth off at them, who knew?

So, yeah, Tony’s current predicament was _all Steve Rogers’ fault_. He hadn’t mouthed off to the judge, he hadn’t shown up in uniform, he hadn’t attempted to bribe or lie his way out of jury duty. He hadn’t even tried to get out because, despite being based out of Stark Tower in New York as an Avenger, his official place of residence was the house in Malibu, and therefore, really, only the County of Los Angeles should be able to summon him for jury duty. 

He’d taken the briefcase armor with him to the courthouse, of course. He’d learned that lesson the hard way, and never wanted to be without the armor. He was, after all, Iron Man. He was Iron Man and Iron Man was him. Rhodey was War Machine, no matter how many times they tried to rebrand him as “Iron Patriot.” 

He had proper paperwork with him for the suitcase armor, just in case anyone wanted to try to take it from him. He’d even let Happy drive him from the Tower to the New York State Supreme Court Building, home to the New York County Courthouse and several federal circuit judges. 

It was Steve’s fault, Tony insisted, even as he was being arrested and the briefcase armor taken from him as they escorted him to the holding cell. Even though Steve hadn’t even been then when Tony had done what he said he’d never do and mouthed off to the judge in such a way that could not be construed as anything except mouthing off and found himself summarily declared to be in contempt and arrested. 

Okay, so maybe it wasn’t Steve’s fault. Maybe it was his own fault. Not that he’d tell anyone that, but, yeah, getting arrested was his own fault. Pepper seemed glad that he was at least wearing pants - that was one time Pep! - and that he hadn’t exacerbated the situation once arrested. She would send someone down to bail him out; he hope she wasn’t sending Steve. 

He was sitting there in the holding cell when he heard the commotion, followed by gunshots, followed by the distinctive sound of off-world weaponry. Realizing that something had happened, he glanced down at his wrists, and called the briefcase armor to him using the copper bracelets he never took off. He might be an Avenger, but unlike Thor and Steve, he was a normal squishy human, and he wasn’t willing to run into a possible firefight without his armor. He’d done that before and look where that had gotten him. 

The armor landed on the floor in front of him, and he crouched down as it built itself. It went to break the door to the holding cell when Tony remembered that, no, he really was a genius. He grabbed the external interface to JARVIS and slid it on, taking control of the unmanned suit. With sure hands - he’d saved many people on Air Force One using an unmanned suit once - he sent the suit up from the holding cells to the main lobby, where the cops were shooting at a young couple wearing ski masks and holding what looked like Chitauri weapons. Tony called for immediate Avengers backup before sending the briefcase suit into the middle of the room and telling the would-be Bonny and Clyde to stand down. 

As expected, it didn’t work, but the New York State Supreme Court Building was really close to Stark Tower, so the Avengers got there in record time for an Assemble call and promptly kicked ass and took names. The would-be Katherine Ferrers and Ralph Chaplin were quickly arrested and taken into custody by S.H.I.E.L.D., the suit standing watch. It wasn’t until after the Avengers were filling out incident reports (federal court = federal Marshals = Captain America filling out paperwork in uniform with a crappy bic stick) that Clint looked up and asked where Tony was. Steve glanced around, and said, “oh, yeah, once I finish this paperwork, I’m supposed to post his bail. Pepper asked me to, said she wanted to teach him a lesson or something. He’s got the briefcase armor and was able to help in the fight, so he’s probably fine. Is anyone done with their paperwork?”

Bruce was, so he went down to the holding cell to check on Tony, who was kneeling on the floor of the holding cell, wearing the JARVIS interface. When he saw Bruce, he flicked his fingers and the suit ambled its way down to the holding cell area and returned to the suitcase. 

“Really, Pepper sent Steve to bail me out?” Tony asked, standing up and stretching his sore muscles. He really was too old for this shit. “Am I really about to… I’m about to be bailed out by Captain America in uniform. That’s a first, even for me.”

It took a few hours to process Tony’s bail and let him out, but he was released and left with the rest of the Avengers, all in uniform, except for Bruce, who hadn’t been needed. 

“Did you really _bail me out of jail_ while wearing your uniform?” Tony asked Steve as they left. 

“Well, it was that or bailing you out naked and the cops tend to frown on public nudity these days.” Steve smirked as Tony spluttered. They all stepped into the quinjet that had landed in front of the building and strapped in as Hawkeye took them back to the Tower.


End file.
